Re-Dedication

It is mid-way through summer term and I should be studying for a midterm in poetry class for tomorrow. Instead, I am wasting an exorbitant amount of time surfing the internet and meeting new people on Facebook. I have recently joined an ex-Jehovah Witness FB page where conversations are constant and engaging. I have friended quite a few people on there. I am always hoping to find someone I know or at least someone who lives nearby, but, alas, no luck so far. It is interesting to meet people whose upbringing was remarkably similar to mine, or possibly even more restricted. Like one family who would never by anything from Proctor & Gamble because of an assumed satanic symbol on all their products.  Another would buy Lucky Charms but dump out all the cereal and throw away the box because she couldn’t keep around something that was “magically delicious”. Others couldn’t eat hotdogs, or watch Disney movies, or have Smurf dolls or trolls. If anyone ever tells you JW’s are not superstitious, don’t believe them! As we all know, superstitions come from ignorance and we really shouldn’t expect anything different from a group of people who aren’t permitted to educate themselves beyond what is printed by the Watchtower society. I am glad, however, that my father wasn’t of the superstitious breed. We never went beyond the things written–it’s not our fault that the religious leaders did. Other than the usual prohibitions for all JW”s (i.e. holidays, birthdays, dances, pledge of allegiance, etc.) my father was very strict about holiday cartoons, spiritistic movies/books, and language–Crap, poo, fart, gosh were all no-no’s. The reaction would have been the same if I had used the other four-letter versions. Music was also something that my father couldn’t tolerate. I’m talking pretty much any kind of music. I went through a 50’s phase when I was about 17 and was told I couldn’t listen to Elvis because some of his songs had the word “rock” in them. I learned to keep my radio under my pillow. “You had a radio?” you might ask. Yeah, believe it or not. My parents bought it for me when I was six years old and it still worked well into my 20’s. I got more use out of that gift than anything else I ever received during childhood. I doubt my dad spent more than $12 for it. Since JW’s don’t have Christmas or birthdays, some have “family days” (oftentimes on parents anniversaries) where gifts are exchanged. I only remember our family doing this once, but the memory has always been golden to me. It was when I got the radio. My mother was still in relatively good health and she prepared a nice dinner for us, and dad bought the board game Sorry! which we spent the evening playing–and everyone let me win. My mother became bed-ridden soon after that and life became less joyous and more to be endured. We never had another day like that, which makes that one all the more poignant.

I am rambling, sorry. The real reason I started writing this blog was to inform you of my recent initiation to a local coven. Last Friday, on the full moon, I was initiated and am now considered a first degree witch. It was an interesting event and not as easy as it may sound. My hands were bound behind my back for 45 minutes which became extremely uncomfortable. I had to repeat certain vows while my hands and feet were bound and I wore a blindfold. I also had to answer in the affirmative to a series of questions which reminded me of the questions asked when I was baptized as one of JW’s when I was fifteen. So I am rededicated to another faith–a faith very different from the first. I have been doing a lot of reading in The Witches Bible by Stewart and Janet Farrar and finding it very interesting. I am in a small coven and am looking forward to attending some larger festivals. I have a lot of learning to do, though, and find the prospects exciting! Any other New Age, or Wiccan believers out there?

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4 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Hello, my name is Andrew and I am also an ex-JW. I haven’t believed in God for about six years. I don’t catch all of your posts so I am really sorry if this has been covered before. People believe things for a variety of reasons, for example people attend church for the rituals or they suspend disbelief for a comforting myth or because they truly believe all the available evidence supports a belief system or all three in some kind of cognitive dissonance. I was wondering what your approach to the Wiccan belief system is? After leaving the Jehovah’s Witnesses I saw the same flaws everywhere else or I didn’t see enough evidence to support claims made and I think it would be interesting to know why Wicca?

  2. Thanks for the comment, Andrew! Why Wicca? That’s a good question. I was brought up to hate Christendom and now that I realize the JW’s don’t even have it right I pretty much hate all Christianity. I think I simply like the idea of an ancient religion that precedes Christianity–something that was taboo before and would offend everyone from my past. But also, I love to experiment and explore. That desire was seriously inhibited in the JW faith, so now I just want to give everything a try. Eventually, I will probably wander into a few churches just to see what their services are all about. A cousin is sending me Richard Dawkins “God Delusion” as I have been wanting to read it. I can see myself eventually being convinced of atheism, but I have a hard time wanting to accept this life as all there is when I spent the first 38 years enslaved to an organization. I like to think I have another chance. Does that all sound confused? Then it mirrors how I feel as I have been out for less than a year and feel like I have been floating in a kind of limbo. Does any of that make sense?

  3. Yeah it makes perfect sense and mirrors my experience almost completely.Good luck 🙂

  4. ExJW Buddhist Pagan here. Not sure if I posted on your blog before but I rededicated myself as well. I try to tell myself that the JW dedication was nullified since I was underage and that I was coerced into doing in. I felt bad about breaking my vows to Jehovah but then I likened it to a minor signing a contract. Those contracts are unenforceable. I’m clearly not the same person today that I was when 17.


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